The secret to getting what you want is to know what you want.

No rocket science. However, it surprises me almost every single day how few people know exactly what they want.


Most people answer the question in gloriously vague goals like having better relationships, or making more money or living healthier.

Which is, not really what they want.

It is not about the relationships itself and it is not about the money or the body either. It is about how you think that ‘result’ will make you feel.
And we all want to feel good 🙂

We all want to change the way we feel and manage our emotions. Towards pleasure or away from pain; as a human being, we have always been very good at that.

So, how do we feel good then, and get what we want?

The short answer is that you need to learn how to manage your own mind and create a sense of mental wellbeing. As this advice in itself is gloriously vague, I am now writing a book on this exact topic.

To give you an idea today, I will shed some light on this fascinating topic.

Step 1: Manage your Energy

We need to take quite some factors into consideration when addressing the mind and creating more mental wellbeing but for today, let’s start with the very basics of Energy.

When you have heaps of energy and you know exactly how to charge and recharge yourself, your mindset or state of mind will be very different than when you feel hijacked by your mind.

  • Do you know what charges you? What makes you holding back from following up on this knowledge?
  • Do you know what takes your energy? Why does this still happen?

Step 2: Awareness

To create more peace of mind, we need to become very aware of our thoughts.

What are you thinking about on a daily basis?

About 65.000 thoughts and they are all shooting left and right. Leaving us feeling completely microwaved at times. Trust me, it happens to all of us!

No, you are not special because you have a creative brain that can never stop thinking. What you have is an untrained mind.

The question is: Which of those thoughts make you feel better and which of those make you feel more anxious, worried, stressed, etc.?

Which thoughts are taking you for a spin in worry-land?
And, can you notice when that happens?
Because when you are aware of it, you have the power to stop it.

That is, if you want to.
There’s a whole universe to explore and examine if you do notice and at the same time, you choose not to act.

Step 3: Trust and Continue to do the work

Of course there are situations and events around us, like political situations, or your relationships with the people that you care about, that will have an influence on how you feel.

The most important thing though is that nothing can really throw you completely off balance any more when you have an undercurrent of peace of mind. The fact that your mind is calm and alert will make you stronger and so much more stable.

To reach your goal of more peace of mind is something that asks for a daily practice and commitment.
For example, by following step 1 of simply making sure that you recharge enough on a daily basis. Or, that you become very aware of situations that do not serve you and step away from them.

If you can’t commit, be very curious about what exactly is holding you back to commit. It is very normal that this happens.

May this blog and my upcoming book inspire you and start walking the path, step by step, day by day.

As you practice these steps, you will start to train the mind and you will find pathways to more peace of mind.

If you want to dive in deeper, join one of my yoga retreats or contact me for a coaching call. I would love to connect!


Rachel Bonkink holds a Masters Degree in Commercial Sciences and thrives on teaching Yoga and Meditation. She has been a life coach for over 10 years and loves spending time by the beach in Portugal. She’s the owner of Revealing Vajra, a leading yoga retreat company. In the past nine years Rachel has organized, marketed and hosted over 80 of her own world wide yoga retreats. Her book, Flex Your Mind, can be ordered right here.

Since March 2020, there is an online offering of retreats and meditation challenges, check out all the details on 

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Yoga Retreats Calendar

  • Relax and Recharge<br>Yoga in Marrakech Relax and Recharge
    Yoga in Marrakech
    25 March - 1 April 2023
  • Relax and Recharge<br>Yoga in Marrakech Relax and Recharge
    Yoga in Marrakech
    22 October - 29 October 2023
  • Dubai for Yogis<br>Bling & Mountains Dubai for Yogis
    Bling & Mountains
  • Silence Retreat<br>Portugal Silence Retreat
  • Personal Transformation Retreat<br>Scotland Personal Transformation Retreat
  • Luxury Retreat<br>Mallorca Luxury Retreat
  • Mindset & Transformation Retreat<br>Oman Mindset & Transformation Retreat
  • 51 Day Meditation Experience<br>Online via Zoom 51 Day Meditation Experience
    Online via Zoom
  • Wonderful Yoga Weekend<br>Belgium Wonderful Yoga Weekend

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    Endorsed by Paul Grilley: ‘Rachel has written a book that makes yoga practical’.